Peace | Love | Courtship - A Post By Two Friends

Happy Monday to my wonderful and committed readers and followers,

Hope you had a lovely weekend? Even if you didn't, cheer yourself up and have a fantabulous week ahead :)

It appears that I'm having new readers from different countries in the world, that's one good thing about the internet. I have been able to reach out to people in Pakistan, Canada, Kenya, America, Hordaland, Doha, Netherlands, Nigeria, United Kingdom, and other countries that I haven't even heard of.

One of my closest girlfriends (She wrote this post: Rag to Riches) who has also been a regular supporter and contributor of my blog; we had a discussion about peace and we have decided to share our discussions with you our readers. We are looking forward to your views.

Here goes the post for this week:

Dialogue between Ife and I:

Not long ago, there was a post on Facebook about how a young lady's fiancé had broken up with her on the basis of his lack of peace. She said his conviction at the inception of the relationship was peace and now that he feels he has lost it, he had to end the relationship.  Ife and I found this quiet strange, considering that a lot of Christians misuse the word peace and equate it with what it is not. This led to our write up on peace. 

Myss Lafunky says: Ife, a lot of people usually say they felt the peace of God, hence they embarked on their relationship. But then again, there are no Bible verses that state that the peace of God is what you need before you embark on a relationship, unless I'm not aware of biblical verses regarding Peace and courtship.  Are you?

Ife says: How do the people know that what they felt was the peace of God? Can peace be quantified?

Were they given the go ahead to embark on the relationship because they felt the peace of God? Hmm...the word 'Peace' has been referenced loosely/and it is still used loosely by some of our Christian singles when people ask how they knew that Mr/Mrs Right was the one, they are quick to say 'I felt the Peace of God', "I was not troubled in my heart, hence I knew she/he was the one".  

Peace is not the absence of trouble. It is unrelated to circumstances and it has nothing to do with what happens on the outside or on the physical. Peace is the end result of total trust in God. Isaiah 53:3 says: "He keeps in perfect peace those whose hearts are stayed on him because He trusts in you".

Peace is confidence in God's ability to see you through any situation. A person who truly has the peace of God can endure a lot of hardship and still enjoy the peace that passes all understanding Philippians 4:6-7. 

The peace the world gives is only present when everything is fine and things are going smoothly. John 14:27 says my peace I give to you, not as the world gives.

Many Christians claim to have peace in their relationship when all is well while they lose it in trouble. This can never be the peace of God.

Peace is a dividend of righteousness, Isaiah 32:17-18 says: "The fruit of that righteousness will be peace; its effect will be quietness and confidence forever.  My people will live in peaceful dwelling places, in secure homes, in undisturbed places of rest."

Peace comes to those who walk in righteousness, Romans 14:17 (For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit). 

The peace of God comes through the word of God as well as a leading through His spirit (click all this scriptures to read them) Luke 7:50 Luke 8:48, Luke 24:36, John 20:19-21 and Romans 8:5-6. 

We cannot claim peace over a certain issue without express instructions from God. If God gives us peace over an issue, the peace will remain permanent in trouble or in joy (Isaiah 54:10).

Before you start that relationship, let God lead you, so that when hard times come, you can rely on His initial instructions; you can always go back to God and seek clarity.

Remember God's word never fails Isaiah 55:11, Numbers 23:19, Psalm 89:34.

We have many promises of His faithfulness in scriptures, we can hold on to them during the time of trouble and we can continue to enjoy His peace.

Final words from us, the Bible says in Psalm 119:165 that:

Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble (New International Version). This implies that, if you obey God's Word, you will have great peace, but if you do not obey God's commandments, you will stumble and the Great Peace of God will not be upon you.

Do you believe the presence of Peace is needed before you embark on your courtship journey?

Ife and I would really like to read your views about Peace, love and courtship.

Thanks for taking your time to read our post.

- Myss Lafunky and Ife

Re-Blog: Men, How Do You Know If You Have Found the Right Woman?

Hi readers and followers,

The blog link to the below article is: 

http://diaryofasuperchamp.wordpress.com/

I'm a follower of the above blog, I quite love the fact that the blogger is a man/Christian. It's quite encouraging as there are few Christian bloggers that are men.

What do you think of the article below?  

Men, How Do You Know If You Have Found the Right Woman?

‘A man who finds a wife finds a good thing’. I have heard this verse spoken of in the context of how a man should pursue a woman and how he should treasure and love his wife. As I was reading the scripture a few days ago, I was compelled to make the sentence negative. If you do this, you’d get ‘A man who does not find a wife does not find a good thing’.

Is God telling us that he wants every one of us to be single? Heavens no (although there is nothing wrong with being single)! Is God telling us that we should chase after someone who is married? God forbid…that is wrong! What God is telling us is that He wants us to find a woman who is already married to Him… that is why the scripture says ‘A man who finds a wife’!

She makes God No. 1 in her life

Her first husband is God. Since her first marriage is to God, He is to take first position in her life and you are to be No.2. And so He should be No.1 for He is better at everything! You should not try to compete with God for the first place in her heart because you cannot compete. You are not as loving as God, you are not as strong as God, you are not anywhere close to being as selfless as God…you cannot make her nearly as happy as God can. So you must not try to take a position that rightfully belongs to God!

Remember the phrase ‘Happy wife, happy life’? If you want her to be happy and want to be happy, then you have to encourage her relationship with God. So have you been pushing her closer to her first love or are you trying to take the place of her first love? Only he gives her life purpose and controls her destiny. Do you want to have your way with her or do you want God to have His way in her life?

A man who finds a woman who is married to Jesus finds a good thing

She is faithful to her first Husband

God is wonderful and marvelous! He is the prince of peace and the author of all good things! If she is not faithful to that kind of a husband, then how can you expect her to be faithful to you?

If she is running after other lovers (idols) and committing harlotry while married to God, then do not be surprised when she continues the practice while with you. Moreover, do not be surprised if you are one of the lovers that she has run towards. Note that any woman who is willing to sacrifice her faithfulness to God to please you has made you an idol. Since all idolatry leads to pain, all you will do in the end is cause her pain. Do not make yourself the idol who causes her to compromise God.

What you want is a faithful woman. A faithful woman is a helper. She will help you stand strong in the Lord when you start to stray. Do not despise such a woman!

A man who finds a woman who is faithfully married to Jesus finds a good thing

She is a good thing

Since only God is good (Mark 10:18), being a good thing means that she is a God-thing. A God-thing will reflect the characteristics of God. More often than not, she will produce the fruit of the Spirit and be a virtuous woman. You will sleep easy at night with such a woman; trust is no issue for she is a God-thing. You know that the intent of thoughts of her heart is to do you good.

Imagine a woman who reflects the things of God. That is a woman who is worth cherishing and sacrificing yourself over. See, it is easy to love and sacrifice yourself for a wife. So let her bring you love, joy, peace, and victory by remaining a God-thing.

A man who finds a woman who is faithfully married to Jesus finds love, joy, and peace! 

So men, let us not be afraid of a wife! If you are courting, do not say…oh man she is super-spiritual. Do not say…oh man, she does not want to be alone with me past 9 pm! Let us step to the plate and become husbands ourselves prior to getting married.

She who is found by a husband is found by a good thing.

Re-Blog: 5 Reasons Why Christian Girls Remain Single

One of my girlfriends sent the below article to me, I read it and my girlfriend and I discussed the article briefly.

I'm in agreement with some of the points.

This is a re-blog of the post:

5 Reasons Why Many Christian Girls Remain Single

In 2012 ,I was invited to be a member of a panel at a Christian singles conference. After speaking about living a purposeful life, and remaining pure in singleness, the topic of marriage invariably came up. A woman stood up and started pouring out her heart about how she desired a husband. How she was in her late thirties and did not want to be alone anymore. She said that she was on the verge of ‘settling’!

In an attempt to comfort her, an older woman whom we will call Sarah stood up and proclaimed that she was single at 60 AND had never married. Sarah started to encourage the younger lady. She said, look at me, I am 60 and not married but I will not settle. I want what God wants for me and will not settle for less. I have had many counterfeit men come into my life. Sarah then went ahead and started to rattle off about the men that had been potential suitors and what was wrong with them. As she spoke, somethings that seemingly escaped her started to become clear to those of us on the panel. She was to blame for being single at 60.

Here are some of the things we realized about Sarah that kept her single

Sarah wanted Jesus…not a disciple of Jesus…but Jesus Himself

Many women, like Sarah are looking for the perfect mate. They want someone who is going to complete them and be their everything! If this is you, then my question to you is this: If a man completes you and becomes your everything, then what position is Jesus taking in your life? Jesus is the one that completes you and is meant to be your everything. So, to look for completeness in a man is to make that man an idol in your life, it is to have put man above God! This will only lead to ruin because no man is perfect! Try as he might, he will disappoint you! So stop looking for someone who will not disappoint you over the lifetime you wish to be married…you will not find it. Even you, yes you…have and still disappoint many people…whether you realize it or not…whether you meant it or not. Instead of looking for perfection, look for someone who is striving towards perfection. This is a person that loves God and does not want to be conformed to the world but whose life’s purpose is to be transformed into the image of Jesus.

As my mom says, if you meet a person who is perfect, run away, for you will make imperfect whatever is making that person seem perfect.

Sarah saw herself as a princess, but she did not care to prince her man

There are many women who see themselves as awesome and incredible royalty. Many women say, I want to be treated like a princess! The issue is that they do not want their man to be a prince. They do not want to share any power or give up any control. Instead, they want their partners to take the position of a slave while treating them like a princess. The reason many women cannot let go of control is because of fear – perhaps due to not dealing with the hurts of pastrelationships. The moment the man does not give her the power she craves, she takes it as he not treating her like a princess and so searches for greener pastures. Conversely, many men see that while they are giving all they have, the woman is not following suit! Many women think that this is part of being pursued; many men simply see it as being disrespectful.

As a princess, you have to make sure you prince your man. Compliment him and let him know that you appreciate that he is being led by the King. Let go of the control. Taking a chance at love means you take a chance with your heart. This is because only the heart can feel love, not your head.

Sarah liked being pursued but did not want to be caught

In the bible, the servant of Abraham went to a land far away in pursuit of a wife for Isaac. When he got there, it was Rebekah that came to the well. When he approached, she did not play games and dilly-dally. No, she said that she would not wait as her family had requested but would follow Eliezer immediately back to Isaac. When Boaz pursued Ruth, Ruth decided to show her interest by laying at his feet. See, both Rebekah and Ruth showed interest. They did not play games or play hard to get.

Ladies, if a prince has found you, then admit it and go forward as long as you have God’s blessing. I am not saying be easy, but at the same time, do not be hard to get. Just as you are a gift to him, he is also a gift to you! If a man is pursing you, do not run him away with games.

Sarah was way too picky

Sarah did not want God to decide whom she should marry but decided on who she wanted to marry. In essence, she said: God, forget about who you desire for me, this is the person I want to marry…now make it happen! It was no longer God’s will for her life but her will for her life!

But does God not want to give us the desires of our heart? Yes…as long as it glorifies God. In fact, the scripture says: delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires. As you delight yourself in the Lord, you will find that His desires become your desire…thus your desire will glorify God!

You must believe right now that what God wants for you is better than what you could ever want for yourself in the long run. If he is not giving you your hearts desires, it may be because you are not ready to handle your heart’s desire. It may be because what you desire is not desirable!

Sarah wanted Boaz but wanted to remain a Delilah

Do not be like Sarah! Every potential suitor she met had some flaw that was fatal. One could not provide. Another could provide but was not attractive enough. A third was attractive and could provide but did not pay her enough attention. Yet, another paid her too much attention. She forgot that she was filled with flaws herself! She was so busy finding fault with everyone that she had no time to look at herself. She was so busy trying to find the speck in someone else’ life that she forgot that the log in her eyes was blinding her vision of the truth about herself. The truth that just like everyone else, she is imperfect and needs a saviour as well!

Sarah could not understand why the one’s she thought were ‘perfect’ for her were not interested. Sarah, perhaps it is because they are not willing to ‘settle’ either.

I thank God that he did not wait for us to be perfect but settled for us. He wants us to settle for nothing less than Himself. This means that we have to take the reins off our own lives and surrender completely to His will. It seemed that Joseph settled for Mary when He married a pregnant girl…but 

He became immortalized in history because of it. Are you willing to settle for God’s best for you?

Can you identify with Sarah at all? Do you agree or disagree with the writer?

The direct link to the blog is: 

http://diaryofasuperchamp.wordpress.com/

Should I Be Looking For My Mrs RIGHT/Mr RIGHT?

Hi all,

I'm currently reading a book by Myles Munroe, I would like to share an excerpt from his book, I 1000% agree with his notion in regards to looking for your MR RIGHT or MRS RIGHT.  I am a living example of his views and I know some people (both men and women) who unconsciously applied the principles below and they were given the best . Do you agree with Myles Munroe and I's views?

Here we go...

God said, " It is not good for the man to be alone.  I will make a helper suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18), He was saying, in essence, "I will make someone who will solve the male's aloneness."

Now, Adam did not go looking for a wife.  She was God's idea for him.  Adam was so busy doing what God had told him to do that he didn't even know he needed a woman.  God had to tell him, "Man, it's not good for you to be alone."

Note that God didn't say Adam was lonely.  There is a difference between "being alone" and "being lonely".

You can be lonely in a crowd, but you can be alone and be as happy as a lark.  There is nothing wrong with being alone at times.  The Bible tells us that it's important to be alone and quiet before the Lord.  Jesus often made it a point to go off by Himself in order to pray and rest.  Being alone can be healthy, but loneliness is a disease. Are you lonely? Is it something you need help with? Feel free to send in your question, I will be happy to help.

Have you noticed that people who are suffering from loneliness never can go into their houses and just sit down in the quiet?  As soon as they get inside, they run for the television and click it on.  They have to have something on that will occupy their minds.  When they can't find anything on television that they like, they run to their IPADS, social media, or any other gadgets that they have.

Some of you single men and women are afraid of being alone.  When you hit age 25, you begin to think you're past your prime, and so you say to yourselves, "I'm never going to get married. I'd better latch on to the first thing that comes along".

That's the reason many people marry spouses who aren't right for them. They start comparing themselves to their friends that are married, the moment someone asks them whether they have found Mr Right/Mrs Right, they go into a depression mode.

Do you know what the problem is?  They haven't learned what it means to be a whole person.

Adam was so together as a man that he didn't even know he was alone.  He was busy obeying God's Word; he was so occupied with dominating, ruling, and subduing; he was so lost in what he was doing, that he didn't know he needed somebody.

But most of us do the reverse.  We don't have time for God because we are busy trying to find Mr/MRS RIGHT.

Some people run from church to church, from one singles programmes to another in order to find the special lady/special guy.

What you are to be doing is to prepare yourself.  Adam was so prepared for Eve that when he saw her, all he said was , 'WOOOOO-Man!".  He didn't go looking for her. Nonetheless, if you find your Mrs Right, prepare yourself well and do the asking.

And to my single sisters, while you are busying serving God in His vineyard, while you are busy with your career, remember to work on your character, remember to develop good attributes pertaining to being a virtuous woman, remember to work on your dressing (modesty is the key- we don't need to be seeing your cleavage everywhere, how short is your dress/skirt?).  While you are busy immersing yourself in God's Word, before you know it, the perfect gentleman/Mr Right will show up.

And when he shows up, you don't need to play hard to get, especially when you know that he is the ONE unless you are seeking clarity from God. There is no award for 'playing hard' to saying Yes. Please click here for a post about readiness for marriage.

Adam was busy in the garden of God, then God brought his wife.

No wonder the scripture says that, "Don't worry about what you're going to eat, what you're going to wear, as a matter of fact, 'don't worry about who you're going to marry'. God wants you to seek him first, serve Him first, immerse yourself in His ways. Then your spouse will be added to you".


- Myss Lafunky

He that Winneth Souls Is WISE. Are You Wise?

Happy Monday to my amazing readers and followers,

Myss Lafunky has had various questions and answers discussions with some of our readers and I really enjoyed them. I usually enjoy counselling singles and I love having thought-provoking discussions with my fellow Christians. It's my passion and ministry; I love seeing lives transformed and I love it when people take bold steps to stand up for God.  

Feel free to send in your questions and note that not all questions are shared on the blog, some are answered privately. I know some of you are sceptical of your story/issues being discussed on the blog as you don't want to be identified by your friends/family/relatives. I totally understand. 

Time for today's post.

As you know, I try to read a verse of the book of Proverbs everyday as I want to be wise in everything:)

I came across a verse in Proverbs 11:30, which states that: 'The seeds of good deeds become a tree of life; a wise person wins friends' (NLT).

                  or 

The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life; and he that winneth souls is wise (KJV).


Firstly..

The SEEDS OF GOOD DEEDS BECOME A TREE OF LIFE 

This means, a life that pleases the Lord and a life that bears fruits would yield results.

When a life that is pleasing the Lord is bearing good fruits (kindness, gentleness, honesty, humility, a life governed by love, calmness, hospitability, forgiving, helpful, truthful, patience etc.), such life is likely to influence the lives of others positively.

Such a life will win the trust, affection and faith of others.

Secondly..

                                           And he who wins souls is wise

To win soul takes a lot of effort, it is a task that requires persistence, wisdom, openness, consistency, availability, above all, the life of the individual that wants to win soul must be governed by the Word of God; a life that lives by God's principles.

Are you willing to win others to Christ by your way of  life?  

Can you confidently state that, your actions and words are winning people to Christ? 

Are you willing to be guided by God in the place of winning souls?

When last did you share the good news to unbelievers?

Want to read an account of someone in the Bible that won people to Christ and his lives pleased the Lord? Kindly take time to read Galatians 1-2 and Acts 22-28, it's about Paul.

- Myss Lafunky

Be sociable and share this post.

Sharing is ministry..

What Does The Bible Teach?

Did you know that the Holy Bible is also known as the scriptures, the Word and the Word of God?

The Bible is inspired by God and is useful for teaching the truth, rebuking error, correcting faults, and giving instruction for right living..

so that the person who serves God may be fully qualified and equipped to do every kind of good deed.

1.   The Bible is for every culture and race.  It does not discriminate.

2.   The Bible has all the answers to every question.

3.   The Bible is full of ALL kinds of advice, from money management, how to be wise, how to be kind, getting along with people, the importance of rest and spending quality time with your family, how to be a virtuous woman, how to be a man of valour, how to parent your children, amongst others.

4.   The Bible gives us directions.

5.   The Bible teaches us the truth.

6.   The Bible will teach and help you to overcome sins and temptations.

7.   The Bible is more than a book, the Bible will enable you to know who Jesus is, you can’t really know about Jesus if you have not read His Word.  Please, read John 1:1-3.

8.   The Bible will teach God’s ways.

9.   The Bible will convict you of your sins.

10. The Bible will teach you about history and it will teach you about things to come.

11. God honours all His Words in the Bible.  

12.The Bible will also transform your life for the better. It would prune you to be the best.

Create time to read the Bible,create at least 15 minutes every day out of your 24 hours to study the Bible as a family, individual and with your friends.

Have you ever considered how your children's church was set up before? Are you in the process of choosing a church, please consider the spiritual growth of your children when deciding on a church.  
If you already attend a child, please remember to monitor what your children are learning from Children's church.

While the Bible may be full of advice, it can also pose a challenge to read. For some people, getting the most of their Bibles starts with finding the right translation and knowing where to start.  Click this link for my daily Bible Study Plan.  

There are a number of Bible translations that appeal to all kinds of readers. Nonetheless, the Bible is meant for everyone to be able to read and understand. God wants his Word known to the world.

If you're having trouble reading your Bible and understanding it, spend some time with other translations. Sometimes it takes phrasing things a little differently for us to understand God's word better.

My favourite translations are: God's Word Translation (GWT), New Century Version (NCV) and New International Version (When I first gave my life to Christ, I  immersed myself into studying NIV Bible).  As a child, I grew up learning and memorising Bible verses with King James Bible Version (KJV).

What's your favourite Bible version?

- Myss Lafunky

Don’t Let Others Control You

It has pleased the Lord to keep us to witness this new month.  It’s June already.  Happy new month to my wonderful readers and followers.

I read an article during the week; as you know, I usually feed my mind in line with Philippians 4:8 and the article has positively impacted my life. The article literally popped on my mind when I became upset, I had to calm myself, and I applied the principle from 'Don't let others control you' article.

There is definitely a correlation between what we feed our mind with and what we implement on a daily basis.

Here goes the article:

               Don’t Let Others Control You

It is an honour for a man to cease from strife and keep aloof from it, but every fool will quarrel (Proverbs 20:3, AMP).

Did you know that when you allow someone else’s words or actions to upset you, you’re allowing them to control you? 

When you say, “You make me so mad,” you’re really just admitting that their actions have power over you.

As long as that person knows they can push your buttons, as long as you keep responding the same way, you are giving them exactly what they want. Sure, people have a right to say and do things that are upsetting, but we also have a right to not get offended. We have a right to overlook their actions.

 

In fact, the Bible says that it’s an honour for a man to keep “aloof” from strife.

In other words, we have to remove ourselves, either physically or emotionally, from strife and offence. It’s not easy, but we can choose to let it roll off of us like water off a duck’s back!

Remember, you don’t need everyone to agree with you all the time. You don’t have to have the approval of others in order to be approved by God. 

Your job is to be the person God made you to be. Overlook offences and let go of strife so you can live in peace and victory all the days of your life!

                                        A PRAYER FOR TODAY

Father, thank You for loving, accepting and approving me just as I am. I know You are doing a work in my life, and I ask for the strength and confidence to overlook offence so that I can honour You in everything I do in Jesus’ name. Amen.

  

Reference: Joel & Victoria Osteen

Have a lovely week!

- Myss Lafunky