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Ken is a young career man, the kind that every lady would have wanted. He is smart, dark and handsome, honest and most importantly, he is a Born-Again Christian. This is Ken's story. I got married to Jane, my Honey Pie, a very
successful and industrious lady with whom I attended the same church in the new
place I had just moved to. Everyone was very happy for us and wished us the best on our new marriage journey.
I love my wife very much and won’t trade her for another woman but some things happened to me and distracted me, a month before my wedding and I want every man to learn from this experience.
I love my wife very much and won’t trade her for another woman but some things happened to me and distracted me, a month before my wedding and I want every man to learn from this experience.
Gles was a very hard working colleague in the
office, she had just been transferred to the branch where I worked and had
gotten the admiration of everyone in such a very short time. She was very smart
and had many admirable characters and I enjoyed working with her. Because we
worked very closely with each other, I got the chance to learn more about her
and I started developing some feelings for her, the kind that always made me
long to get to the office and see her every day.
Soon, these feelings went from just being feelings to becoming words and from words to hanging out regularly after work. In hind sight, this was probably when I should have come to my senses but as the saying goes, stolen water tastes sweet (Proverbs 9:17), I continued in it. I knew what I was doing was not right but I was enjoying it too much to worry about the consequences.
A few weeks into our marriage, my wife’s suspicion about my relationship with Gles arose when she saw a text message on my phone from an Unknown number (which by the way was how I saved Gles’ number on my phone) but I made her discard those suspicions by telling her that I had been receiving such weird messages from that unknown number for quite sometimes.
Soon, these feelings went from just being feelings to becoming words and from words to hanging out regularly after work. In hind sight, this was probably when I should have come to my senses but as the saying goes, stolen water tastes sweet (Proverbs 9:17), I continued in it. I knew what I was doing was not right but I was enjoying it too much to worry about the consequences.
A few weeks into our marriage, my wife’s suspicion about my relationship with Gles arose when she saw a text message on my phone from an Unknown number (which by the way was how I saved Gles’ number on my phone) but I made her discard those suspicions by telling her that I had been receiving such weird messages from that unknown number for quite sometimes.
The final straw that broke the camel’s back of
my truck load of errors was a business training that a couple of my colleagues and I
had to attend in another city which meant that I was away from home for 2 weeks
and of course, Gles also had to attend this training. As it was a company sponsored
training, all members of staff on this trip were lodged in the same hotel.
Mornings and afternoons were for the training while the evening was for FUN! I
spent most of my evening time chatting with Gles at the hotel restaurant and
sometimes we just stayed back in my room to chat.
On one of those nights, we were having dinner and chatting in my room and as it’s commonly said, one thing led to another and we ended up in bed. I felt very horrible after this experience but then again, I didn't feel horrible. It was like I was in a state of confusion; I had just had sex with a woman that was not my wife and though I knew it was wrong because I had always stood for fidelity in marriage and I felt really bad that I had stooped so low but again, I began to feel good about it like I had just conquered a city.
Though after this experience, I promised myself never to allow myself to get into any sexual relations with Gles. And just for the records, Gles never knew I was married, I always hid my wedding ring in my wallet while in the office and then placed it on my finger on my way home.
On one of those nights, we were having dinner and chatting in my room and as it’s commonly said, one thing led to another and we ended up in bed. I felt very horrible after this experience but then again, I didn't feel horrible. It was like I was in a state of confusion; I had just had sex with a woman that was not my wife and though I knew it was wrong because I had always stood for fidelity in marriage and I felt really bad that I had stooped so low but again, I began to feel good about it like I had just conquered a city.
Though after this experience, I promised myself never to allow myself to get into any sexual relations with Gles. And just for the records, Gles never knew I was married, I always hid my wedding ring in my wallet while in the office and then placed it on my finger on my way home.
I returned home after the training and my very
own wife requested me to use a condom before I could be sexually intimate with
her. I was MAD! What nonsense! I demanded not to use one and told her to never
make such a request. At this time, things had started getting a bit awkward in
the house because my wife didn't like the fact that I spent most of the time in
the office and when I came home, I was too tired to have a decent conversation
not to talk of any kind of intimate relation.
Two weeks after my training, Jane woke me up in
the middle of the night saying she had something important to say she had
something on her mind to tell me to which I muttered “Go ahead then!” She told
me she had contracted Gonorrhoea and doesn’t know how she got it, she was in tears and said all kinds of things like “My God will vindicate me .
. .”
I was so angry! She must have been cheating on me I thought. I made it clear to her that night that I didn't want any physical intimacy with her till she got rid of the disease.
I was so angry! She must have been cheating on me I thought. I made it clear to her that night that I didn't want any physical intimacy with her till she got rid of the disease.
But after all the “fronting” I thought to myself if I actually
believed she was cheating on me knowing that she had always been committed to
our relationship and that she could have hidden the details of the disease from
me and gotten it treated without my knowing.
That train of thought made me to examine myself and get checked in confidence by our family doctor who was treating my wife also
and he confirmed to me that I had Gonorrhoea, and it must have been in my
body system for about 4 weeks but for some reasons he couldn't explain, the
symptoms hadn't become evident. Without any doubt, I had gotten this from Gles
during the training week away.
It was as though my world came crashing down on me. I had never felt as sad as that in my entire life. I had disappointed myself, my wife and my God. I went straight back to the office and told Gles the truth about my marriage and how I may have caught Gonorrhoea from her and told her I didn't want to continue the relationship and asked her to forgive me for leading her on.
It was as though my world came crashing down on me. I had never felt as sad as that in my entire life. I had disappointed myself, my wife and my God. I went straight back to the office and told Gles the truth about my marriage and how I may have caught Gonorrhoea from her and told her I didn't want to continue the relationship and asked her to forgive me for leading her on.
I went home and knelt before my wife and
confessed all my perfidy to her and asked for her forgiveness and with tears in
her eyes, she said “I forgive you but how can I trust you again?” Those words
stuck to my head. I had betrayed my wife’s trust, I had pushed her to the wall
just for the sake of my selfish lust.
If you’re reading my story today and you’re
already emotionally cheating on your spouse, you can be rest assured that it won’t
stop there but will get deeper and in the end you would wish you hadn't done so.
Prayer
Father, as you helped Jesus to overcome temptation and you strengthened him, by the power of your Spirit, uphold me and strengthen me in Jesus name Matthew 4:1-11
- Twale
Photo credit: Google images and http://africancreed.wordpress.com/
Prayer
Father, as you helped Jesus to overcome temptation and you strengthened him, by the power of your Spirit, uphold me and strengthen me in Jesus name Matthew 4:1-11
- Twale
Photo credit: Google images and http://africancreed.wordpress.com/
The piece is a touching one. it takes the workings of God on a man for a man to be broken. two ends cannot be wrong, revenge is not an option when the home is rough. the woman kept her loyalty and held on to God until the status quo originally in the home was restored.
ReplyDeletethings may get bad bringing about hurt but healing is possible, turn around is possible when eyes are glued and focussed on God.
Thank you Anonymous for your comment.
DeleteNice piece. It is not easy to overcome the flesh but by the word of God and action.
ReplyDeleteThank you Geemary. I quite agree that the Word of God can certainly help an individual to overcome temptation. It is the Word of God that has been hidden in one's heart that one would follow. There's a place of self-discipline, self-determination and understanding the consequences of one's actions are ways that one could also overcome the flesh.
Delete